October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. So, please be aware that domestic violence is not gender specific. In fact, just as many, if not more, women perpetrate domestic violence on men than do men on women. Then there’s female on female domestic violence… hard to blame that on men isn’t it.
The Los Angeles Daily Journal, which is the primary legal newspaper in California, last week confirmed that they scheduled for publication Mr. Angelucci’s op ed below in yesterdays edition… for DV Awareness Month. Unfortunately, the Daily Journal is subscription only so there is no link we can provide to the published article.
By Marc E. Angelucci
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. And on Oct. 4, President Barack Obama made his　yearly　speech to raise awareness about this serious problem in the U.S. Unfortunately, like other presidents before him, his speech only referred to victims as “women,” leaving　male victims and their children invisible as usual.
When Obama mentions our soldiers fighting overseas, he rightfully says “men and women” to include the minority. Why don’t domestic violence victims don’t deserve the same dignity?
Numbers shouldn’t matter. All victims, male or female,　should be recognized. But it is worth mentioning that male victims are not a tiny number. According to the　Centers for Disease Control, more than one in three women and more than one in four men　have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime, while　one in four women and one in seven men have experienced “severe” forms of the same.
I became an advocate for male victims over 10 years ago when　my best friend’s wife, an alcoholic,　repeatedly assaulted him when she was drunk. She would punch him, kick him, throw furniture at him and　even try　to stab him. He refused to hit back because he knew he would be arrested. He did not want his wife arrested. And he couldn’t afford to take the kids anywhere else. So　he and I called several domestic violence shelters in　Los Angeles. But none　would help　a male victim even with　just a hotel voucher or counseling. These were state-funded programs that　men pay at least half of the taxes toward. Rather than help all victims, they referred male victims　to the　remote desert community of Lancaster where a shelter called Valley Oasis sets　aside one home for battered men.　That was too far for my friend and his kids who went to school in Alhambra. So the violence continued. Eventually he called police and she was convicted. Then he obtained a restraining order and had her kicked out of the house.
While nobody was seriously hurt, the psychological harm to the kids　is immeasurable.
Eventually I filed a lawsuit on behalf of four battered men against the state of California, which resulted in a landmark appellate decision holding it is unconstitutional for the law to exclude male victims and their children from state-funded domestic violence services. This was a step in the right direction, but was not enough. Enforcement of the decision is still weak. Thankfully, the Los Angeles County　Domestic Violence recently approved an official task force on male victims.
Abraham Lincoln, John Wayne, Humphrey Bogart, Al Green, Phil Hartman and Chuck Finley are among many famous male victims. And I’m hopeful that one day all victims will be treated with the same dignity and respect regardless of sex. Nov. 19 is International Men’s Day, and I invite people to do something on that day to raise awareness about this long neglected side of domestic violence.
Marc E. Angelucci is an attorney and the vice　president of the National Coalition For Men.
Very well said Mr. Angelucci. Biden and Obama are a disgrace to humanity when in this century they would rather further their agenda of feminist kowtowing instead of helping all victims of domestic violence. As you stated, it’s always “men and women” except when it comes to recognizing male victims of domestic violence. I only wish I could comment in the newspaper as well.